had breakfast with shabir. i was in a bad mood for multiple, repetitive reasons but none caused by him. but he was there, and always is. it has been almost 2 years, and i never said this to him, for i know how it wud make him feel, but i said it this morning.
leave me alone.
i apologize babe.aum.
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Pepsi. But Tasted Like Beer.
i have 3 pages left before i finish The Black Album. sigh~. im'na delay readin it coz i hvnt found a substitute yet. maybe i should borrow a book from, lets say, amar?agaga.
i couldnt sleep yesteday nite. so i watched a movie. ive been meanin to watch that movie about fidel castro but couldnt find the dvd. but last nite i came across this vcd entitled 9 Songs. the cover showed that this movie has won awards at the prestigios Sundance and Toronto film festival. that peaked my interest.
my rumates were asleep. efa was asleep. i clicked play. started off with a singing rock band. followed by a couple making love. and it was very, very visually unsencored. and loud too (i had trouble slowing the voice down).then another rock band started playing again. followed, again, by that same couple makin love.diferent position this time. the cycle went on and on till the end of the movie. and thats it. i can count the dialogues with my fingers. wtf.
so my point is. do movies which include lots of display of penises and vagina, and a with a little of life's dilemma and 'morality' thrown into them, guaranteed a Jury Selection Awards at Sundance? so they're considered an art film, because the director was using sex, as a tool to depict the protagonist relationship with his girlfriend as it unfolds, and rock concerts, to represent the timelines. it was smoothly told but, at times i did feel like watchin porn. oh my eyes! another thing. the line up of rock bands includes Franz Ferdinand, Primal Scream and The von Bondies. (i dont recognize the other 6 bands)
artsy-fartsy. that reminds me of a particular episode of Southpark. A film festival was held there, and Cartman, Kyle, Kenny and (i forgot the other one's name) sneaked ino the cinema to watch one of the art film that was nominated. it was about gay fucking each other and lesbian in prisons. haha. that was cynical. and way before Ang Lee's commercialized Brokeback Mountain too.
and yep. Pepsi that tasted like beer. drank it last nite and 'ask for more'. (efa got drunk and stripped naked with akak fpi hehe) got it from our futsal hamper. nope, not expired yet. efa checked the date. not exactly like beer more like smell like one. not that i kno how beer tasted like~ oho.
tomorrow. front page of of Kosmo!. 'Pepsi Berperisa Arak'.nantikan.
this should put jenglot out of the headlines.
i couldnt sleep yesteday nite. so i watched a movie. ive been meanin to watch that movie about fidel castro but couldnt find the dvd. but last nite i came across this vcd entitled 9 Songs. the cover showed that this movie has won awards at the prestigios Sundance and Toronto film festival. that peaked my interest.
my rumates were asleep. efa was asleep. i clicked play. started off with a singing rock band. followed by a couple making love. and it was very, very visually unsencored. and loud too (i had trouble slowing the voice down).then another rock band started playing again. followed, again, by that same couple makin love.diferent position this time. the cycle went on and on till the end of the movie. and thats it. i can count the dialogues with my fingers. wtf.
so my point is. do movies which include lots of display of penises and vagina, and a with a little of life's dilemma and 'morality' thrown into them, guaranteed a Jury Selection Awards at Sundance? so they're considered an art film, because the director was using sex, as a tool to depict the protagonist relationship with his girlfriend as it unfolds, and rock concerts, to represent the timelines. it was smoothly told but, at times i did feel like watchin porn. oh my eyes! another thing. the line up of rock bands includes Franz Ferdinand, Primal Scream and The von Bondies. (i dont recognize the other 6 bands)
artsy-fartsy. that reminds me of a particular episode of Southpark. A film festival was held there, and Cartman, Kyle, Kenny and (i forgot the other one's name) sneaked ino the cinema to watch one of the art film that was nominated. it was about gay fucking each other and lesbian in prisons. haha. that was cynical. and way before Ang Lee's commercialized Brokeback Mountain too.
and yep. Pepsi that tasted like beer. drank it last nite and 'ask for more'. (efa got drunk and stripped naked with akak fpi hehe) got it from our futsal hamper. nope, not expired yet. efa checked the date. not exactly like beer more like smell like one. not that i kno how beer tasted like~ oho.
tomorrow. front page of of Kosmo!. 'Pepsi Berperisa Arak'.nantikan.
this should put jenglot out of the headlines.
Monday, September 18, 2006
An Atheist, A Blasphemer, and A Pervert.
monday 12.10am.
havin monday blues. no class until 4pm. my body ache all over from futsal yesterday. we came in 2nd (yippee!) tapi ntah mane hampernye tak nampak lagi.
my body fat percentage : definitely on the rising. went to faris yesterday for dinner. lori dewan bandaraya was still at its stationary place for weeks, so we ate inside, where it was cramped like hell. dinner with shabir, nadia n walah. kire nowadays i met nadia only for her to see me stuffing greasy food into my mouth la. nadia poked around my bulging stomach. jesus mother of moses! the bulge wasnt supppose to be there. it was efa's jeans im wearing. its too tight. there u go. that should justify my denial. hoho.
ok im almost finish with the book im reading The Black Album by Hanif Kureishi. i particularly like this scene in the bathroom, where deedee (shahid's lecturer-girlfriend) was harassing shahid, pressuring him to admit that he's an atheist, a blasphemer and a pervert, while his pants are around his knees and and his dick in deedee's hand. that was intense, but shahid prevails, i know he would. another part : shahid's sister in-law wanted to slap him because she suspected him to have started praying and visiting the mosque. it was disturbing, but hillarious, the way its written is fill with dry wit. i never read a character as sweet and as confusingly tormented like shahid. a paki-boy who cant stand the thought of fucking an asian girl. but he comes along with his religious friends, defending abused muslims around essex in london, and retired to nights of drugs, alcohol and sex. enjoys both heineken and lemon vodka, and the soothing, cool feeling of a mosque. he names his book, the one he's workin on, The Prayer-mat of The Flesh. all this n u ant help but rooting or shahid, for the way he is innocently portrayed.
u cant help but feel related in some way with shahid, can ya?
oh. another thing. in this book, thre is this scene where they were discussing the iranian's fatwah. the one about killing the author. hanif kureishi did his best not to mention rushdie's name, intentionally, but he did mention Midnight's Children. a dead giveaway. cheeky guy, that kureishi is. are all muslim (name) writers like this? shahid with his heart undecided, joined his muslim friends burning a copy of the book, but didnt cheer.
oh n i dint imagine him looking like like Prince no more. Now he looks like a younger n cuter Michael Corleone from The Godfather. smoother-featured al pacino in college.
very, very interesting read.
havin monday blues. no class until 4pm. my body ache all over from futsal yesterday. we came in 2nd (yippee!) tapi ntah mane hampernye tak nampak lagi.
my body fat percentage : definitely on the rising. went to faris yesterday for dinner. lori dewan bandaraya was still at its stationary place for weeks, so we ate inside, where it was cramped like hell. dinner with shabir, nadia n walah. kire nowadays i met nadia only for her to see me stuffing greasy food into my mouth la. nadia poked around my bulging stomach. jesus mother of moses! the bulge wasnt supppose to be there. it was efa's jeans im wearing. its too tight. there u go. that should justify my denial. hoho.
ok im almost finish with the book im reading The Black Album by Hanif Kureishi. i particularly like this scene in the bathroom, where deedee (shahid's lecturer-girlfriend) was harassing shahid, pressuring him to admit that he's an atheist, a blasphemer and a pervert, while his pants are around his knees and and his dick in deedee's hand. that was intense, but shahid prevails, i know he would. another part : shahid's sister in-law wanted to slap him because she suspected him to have started praying and visiting the mosque. it was disturbing, but hillarious, the way its written is fill with dry wit. i never read a character as sweet and as confusingly tormented like shahid. a paki-boy who cant stand the thought of fucking an asian girl. but he comes along with his religious friends, defending abused muslims around essex in london, and retired to nights of drugs, alcohol and sex. enjoys both heineken and lemon vodka, and the soothing, cool feeling of a mosque. he names his book, the one he's workin on, The Prayer-mat of The Flesh. all this n u ant help but rooting or shahid, for the way he is innocently portrayed.
u cant help but feel related in some way with shahid, can ya?
oh. another thing. in this book, thre is this scene where they were discussing the iranian's fatwah. the one about killing the author. hanif kureishi did his best not to mention rushdie's name, intentionally, but he did mention Midnight's Children. a dead giveaway. cheeky guy, that kureishi is. are all muslim (name) writers like this? shahid with his heart undecided, joined his muslim friends burning a copy of the book, but didnt cheer.
oh n i dint imagine him looking like like Prince no more. Now he looks like a younger n cuter Michael Corleone from The Godfather. smoother-featured al pacino in college.
very, very interesting read.
Thursday, September 14, 2006
i am bored. juz got back from havin a chat with fafa. sha's a bullet train when it comes to talking. ah now i realised how i missed her. wish her mom wud take back her car so that she wont be going home so much.
ive started a new book. The Black Book by Hanif Kureishi. had it in my possession for quite sometime but only started reading it. the story is simple, but difficult to grasp its meaning. but i like how the dialogue sparkles with a dry, angry wit.
The story is set in the London of 1989, the year the Berlin Wall came down and the year of the fatwah, its a thriller with a background of raves, ecstacy, religious ferment and sexual passion..like i know anything bout fatwah and the Berlin Wall(all i kno is its not separating east n west germany anymo). what the hell does it have anything to do with Shahid ?( the main character who falls in love with his own lecturer)
i imagined Shahid to look like Prince.
its a delightful read.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Speedzone with Heels.
the other day shabir and i went shoppin for his sister's delayed wedding present. not knowing nina enough to know what to get her, ive decided on a lame gift for newlyweds, a frame. shabir wanted something to show that he's eager for a niece/nephew so we bought a pair of baby stocking as well.
so shabir went to que up at the cashier. i went somewhere looking for cards. then it was his turn to pay.
cashier #1 : (saying to his fellow cashier, loudly) Ape kene mengene frame ngan stokin, dowh?
cashier#2 : A'ah, pekebenda ntah dia ni.
cashier#1 : Aku rase frame ni untuk awek dia kot. stokin ntok anak sedara.
Shabir, right in front or 'em, perfectly within hearing distance.
The two cashiers finished packing, turned to shabir. the wrapping counter is over there,sir kate salah seorang daripada mereka.
Shabir pon kate,Oh kat sane eh?time kaseh.
Those 2 ignorant idiots wrapped in morons were dumbfounded.
This is just of the many situations. but im not'na tell 'em all and not on shabir's side. as a matter of fact, i am pissed. with shabir (yeah you babe). ok maybe not shabir, but his deary mommy, Puan Syakila.(oh sorry for the abrupt change of story.im suddenly pissed).
Ive met her in person, shook her oh so graceful pakistan hands, even kissed it, smelled my best smell and smile my most captivating smile.
and the said person wouldnt even looked at me.
u see she's not against malays. she's friends with malays, speaks malay, read n write malay. she's definitely not a racist( i sure hope so). but oh no. no,no,no,no,no. no malays are to marry any of her children. nehi nehi not in my family.
Ive been with shabir for almost 2 years. so this is a really good news for me. mighty good.
what is the matter with malays?(bsides the obvious ones) why wudnt puan syakila own us as a family?does she know she's livin in malay soils for god sakes. why live with malay if u dont really approved of 'em? why let shabir drive an iswara and not some pakistani-made car? why put 'g' in bolognese if ur not gonna pronounce it?
oh no im not here to idolize and demonstrate malay goodness or tell another 'amani' story. let amar do that. this isnt bout race. no this is personal. im waging war. im waging war against my boyfriend's mother.
allrite, im exaggerating. and i know all the answer to all the why's im just being ignorant (like she is to his son's feelings!). i wudnt call it a war coz if it is, im the sore loser hands down. im the one who stays with shabir until now. im the one who's willing to let my years wasted to face uncertainties. dont get me wrong im not talking bout tying the knot. that is not gona happen for a veeeeeeeeeery long time. not with shabir. (but i do like to tease him just to see him sweat). but to put ur pakistan-self over my-malay-self is intolerable. to know there isn't even a tiny marginal space for myself to squeeze amid those hairy beings (sorry syg if ur reading this i do love ur hair they tickle me i like to be tickled) is unfathomable and definitely unsatisfying.
i started to sound grumpy here. its not like i hate his mother. thats a strong word. how cud anybody hate a mother, the one who gave birth to the man i love. yes i love that tall giant. that Big Friendly Giant with devastatingly handsome feature. i may have doubts, (plenty of doubts), advices against him, jeers, fights, misunderstanding, lied, cheated, my heart broken, broken his heart (big time,sori babe) and felt bored and unsatisfied, but who hasnt. we all live with it. n seriously ive never met anybody quite like him. i will not start describing shabir for public viewing coz he's all mine and im keeping it that way. i may look like a midget walking beside him, we have the classic case of misfit, but who'd care if i dont.
so im'na continue taking chances.
ps : this wasnt what im goin to write about in the 1st place. i was gonna write about this really tall guy, ( taller than shabir,yay!), ezrina and a pill-ladened guy and this chubby couple grinding their sweaty asses off at speedzone. they look like two huge, slimy jellybeans. what i sight i tell u. i, shabir, ezrina, apek, n some other guys, we had a blast. where the hell were you guys?
and whatever happen to that story?
so shabir went to que up at the cashier. i went somewhere looking for cards. then it was his turn to pay.
cashier #1 : (saying to his fellow cashier, loudly) Ape kene mengene frame ngan stokin, dowh?
cashier#2 : A'ah, pekebenda ntah dia ni.
cashier#1 : Aku rase frame ni untuk awek dia kot. stokin ntok anak sedara.
Shabir, right in front or 'em, perfectly within hearing distance.
The two cashiers finished packing, turned to shabir. the wrapping counter is over there,sir kate salah seorang daripada mereka.
Shabir pon kate,Oh kat sane eh?time kaseh.
Those 2 ignorant idiots wrapped in morons were dumbfounded.
This is just of the many situations. but im not'na tell 'em all and not on shabir's side. as a matter of fact, i am pissed. with shabir (yeah you babe). ok maybe not shabir, but his deary mommy, Puan Syakila.(oh sorry for the abrupt change of story.im suddenly pissed).
Ive met her in person, shook her oh so graceful pakistan hands, even kissed it, smelled my best smell and smile my most captivating smile.
and the said person wouldnt even looked at me.
u see she's not against malays. she's friends with malays, speaks malay, read n write malay. she's definitely not a racist( i sure hope so). but oh no. no,no,no,no,no. no malays are to marry any of her children. nehi nehi not in my family.
Ive been with shabir for almost 2 years. so this is a really good news for me. mighty good.
what is the matter with malays?(bsides the obvious ones) why wudnt puan syakila own us as a family?does she know she's livin in malay soils for god sakes. why live with malay if u dont really approved of 'em? why let shabir drive an iswara and not some pakistani-made car? why put 'g' in bolognese if ur not gonna pronounce it?
oh no im not here to idolize and demonstrate malay goodness or tell another 'amani' story. let amar do that. this isnt bout race. no this is personal. im waging war. im waging war against my boyfriend's mother.
allrite, im exaggerating. and i know all the answer to all the why's im just being ignorant (like she is to his son's feelings!). i wudnt call it a war coz if it is, im the sore loser hands down. im the one who stays with shabir until now. im the one who's willing to let my years wasted to face uncertainties. dont get me wrong im not talking bout tying the knot. that is not gona happen for a veeeeeeeeeery long time. not with shabir. (but i do like to tease him just to see him sweat). but to put ur pakistan-self over my-malay-self is intolerable. to know there isn't even a tiny marginal space for myself to squeeze amid those hairy beings (sorry syg if ur reading this i do love ur hair they tickle me i like to be tickled) is unfathomable and definitely unsatisfying.
i started to sound grumpy here. its not like i hate his mother. thats a strong word. how cud anybody hate a mother, the one who gave birth to the man i love. yes i love that tall giant. that Big Friendly Giant with devastatingly handsome feature. i may have doubts, (plenty of doubts), advices against him, jeers, fights, misunderstanding, lied, cheated, my heart broken, broken his heart (big time,sori babe) and felt bored and unsatisfied, but who hasnt. we all live with it. n seriously ive never met anybody quite like him. i will not start describing shabir for public viewing coz he's all mine and im keeping it that way. i may look like a midget walking beside him, we have the classic case of misfit, but who'd care if i dont.
so im'na continue taking chances.
ps : this wasnt what im goin to write about in the 1st place. i was gonna write about this really tall guy, ( taller than shabir,yay!), ezrina and a pill-ladened guy and this chubby couple grinding their sweaty asses off at speedzone. they look like two huge, slimy jellybeans. what i sight i tell u. i, shabir, ezrina, apek, n some other guys, we had a blast. where the hell were you guys?
and whatever happen to that story?
Friday, September 08, 2006
'Tataglia' With a Sounding 'g'.
so.
havent been here in awhile. having the same dilemma as alia. type and delete. type and delete.
type and delete.
how the hell are u suppose to write to ur hearts content, while makin sure u havent touch nobody's sore spot? or mistakenly pouring out ur guilty pleasures? how do one become ignorantly bliss? or blissfully ignorant? somebody, do teach me.
saturday.speedzone,with slippers.
havent been here in awhile. having the same dilemma as alia. type and delete. type and delete.
type and delete.
how the hell are u suppose to write to ur hearts content, while makin sure u havent touch nobody's sore spot? or mistakenly pouring out ur guilty pleasures? how do one become ignorantly bliss? or blissfully ignorant? somebody, do teach me.
saturday.speedzone,with slippers.
Friday, September 01, 2006
efa sangat bersetuju
hari ini efa (sangat) bersetuju untuk bekerjasame menulis blog bersama aku.
setelah memikirkan ape untuk ditulis, we decided to kutuk rico.(sorry rico we had to).
ainnur : so efa ape nak tulis?
efa : bley ke? nanti rico mara...tanak kawan ngn kite da...
ainnur : takpe. dr. bad maseh ada.
efa : ya allah. kene buang lak kite dari kolej ni.
ainnur : takpe. dr. kaderi maseh ada.
so merdeka eve. the curve. bersama rakan2.
ainnur : efa! ko nak g mane?! aku nak type dah ni!
efa : .......
(efa kluar dari bilik.)
so i'll continue later.
setelah memikirkan ape untuk ditulis, we decided to kutuk rico.(sorry rico we had to).
ainnur : so efa ape nak tulis?
efa : bley ke? nanti rico mara...tanak kawan ngn kite da...
ainnur : takpe. dr. bad maseh ada.
efa : ya allah. kene buang lak kite dari kolej ni.
ainnur : takpe. dr. kaderi maseh ada.
so merdeka eve. the curve. bersama rakan2.
ainnur : efa! ko nak g mane?! aku nak type dah ni!
efa : .......
(efa kluar dari bilik.)
so i'll continue later.
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